mustachio bashio

so i still haven´t retrieved the pictures from pedro and alberto, so today i thought i would give you all a lesson in facial hair management. i have been going to the university during the day to spend time with lidia and eduardo and practice my spanish, and then we usually meet up with david somewhere to take comida. a few days back the weather here in madrid was glorious. probably a good 70 degrees outside, sunny...perfect. i realized at that point that the function of my beard, which was all but necessary to prevent frostbite of the cheeks in northern europe, has become a near hindrance in sunny, warm southern europe. the hair obviously doesn´t allow for proper facial ventilation, thus handicapping the body´s natural response to an increase in body heat by sending blood to the outer extremities (cheeks being one of these). so the next day i took to the rat nest residing on my face with some clippers and tried out a few new looks.

when i started i had this kind of fidel castro, reckless communist look going on. the first stop on the facial hair design train is a mixture of a look i have sported before and a new element. i like to call it the "soul king" it is a blend of a standard imperial stache with the added soul patch. this style is popular among members of hell´s angels and anyone who wants to spend their days getting odd stares and having children rushed away from them by their mothers to the other side of the street.




this style i like to call the "cage fighter" (notice the fist pump). it is a close variation of the soul king, but with a cleaner look on the jaw. this helps slip some of the quick jabs and round-house kicks to the face when in the ring. obvioulsy by its name you can deduce that it is a popluar style amongst cage fighters, but it also a common fashion to those deemed as rednecks.



a standard "musketeer." the musketeer is recognizable by an upturned mustache accompanied with a soul patch. this is a classic stache style that has origens from the early middle ages. there´s not much to be said about this look, but if you see a really good one someday out there on the streets or in a magazine, it will probably shortly take your breath away.



"70´s" what else do you need to know. the 70´s ushered in a period of mustache tolerance that probably won´t ever be reached in my lifetime. it was the deal to have an upper lip warmer in that decade, it´s just what you did. this style is often accomanied by bountiful sideburns, know as chops, which really only add to the disco flavor. staying alive! (the 70´s stache is essentialy the same style as your average mexi-stache, unfortuanately, i lack the melatonin and origen to call mine a mexi stache)


this is a "styled stache." pretty much what you do is take a standard 70´s mustache and clean it up. you should frame the upper lip with the bottom of the stache, and pull down the top of the stache form a slim lip belt. this style is seen less frequently probably because of the constant upkeep, but when done well, it is a lovely site. it is a common style with circus ringleaders (if they dont go with the conventional handlebar mustache) and hosts in really fancy restaurants.

i really dont think i need to name this stache. we all know who wore this style and made it neigh impossible for your avrage joe to wear it in this day of political correctness. the point of this stache is merely to show that you have the ability to grow a stache. it serves no real function beyond that, and it only proves as a hinderance in nasal hygiene. this style is popular amongst power hungry dictators who don´t have the balls to face their just recompense, and amongst silent movie stars (i know, it is almost humorously ironic how different those two are)

"clean" -ish "shaven" it really does feel nice to let the wind touch the face once again, and to actually know whats going on with the skin on my face. i suppose at this point i will probably slowly let the beast grow again until i have another vision-like experience prompting me to hack her down.

thanks fo playing.